Depression Lies (Thank you Bloggess)

This is a repost of a comment I put on Wilwheaton.net

I battled a 15 year long depression, but for me it was the symptom of a much more serious progressively getting worse mental illness. Yes my life at the time sucked (It still kind of does) and even on medication I was depressed or angry all the time. Life dealt me a s#!tty hand.
It was after I had lost most of my friends by moving across the country that I decided I needed to do something. Medication alone wasn’t helping and in Canada we don’t usually do the talking cure. So I focused on the negative aspects of my life and thought about solutions. I started by focusing more on positive things, sure they were few and far between, I was living on disability and had a nightmare for a psychiatrist that was over medicating me. But I did have a few good friends on the west coast that could help me through my depression. I found that when I got really suicidey I would smoke pot and feel marginally better. I am a strong proponent of medicinal marijuana, and I would be dead without it. Dead.

I was really depressed originally because the only woman I ever wanted to marry had betrayed me and I broke up with her. I missed her a lot. Then I was diagnosed bipolar affective and my life fell apart. I stopped working and I stopped socializing for YEARS. My diagnosis destroyed my feeling of self worth. The doctors that were involved did a really bad job of telling me in a way that would mean my life would continue. So I moved in with my mom. I built a very small circle of friends on the west coast. I’m originally from Ontario. I just existed.

Then I really cleaned out my life. I focused on positive aspects and stopped getting upset about the things I couldn’t do anything about. It worked somewhat. I was still down, oh I should mention I tried anti-depressants but had a severe reaction to every one I tried.
Now I’ve moved back to Toronto and reconnected with my friends from when I was a teenager. We still get along great, and the decision to come back has improved my mood even more.

I can say I’m happy now, and Thank You Wil Wheaton and Jenny Lawson for speaking out about awareness. 1 in 4 people have some sort of mental illness and depression is common, there are solutions. It just takes a lot of work.

To Quote the Bloggess: Depression Lies.

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About vortexian

I'm a long time net user and writer. I just thought I'd collect somethings here.
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